A Movie We’ll Never See? Are You Sure?

First, sorry for my absence. Grad school has been keeping me busy, and I haven’t had much time to watch any movies, let alone write.

Secondly, some of you may have heard of the new movie called 100 Years. It’s a project recently completed by director Robert Rodriguez and actor John Malkovich in connection with Louis XIII Cognac. What’s the movie about? I have no idea, and we may continue to have no idea until the day we die. Why? Well, because the movie was place in a timed vault and will not be shown to the public until November 18, 2115. That’s right. We have to wait 100 years to see the damn thing. At which point, we’ll all likely be dead or be so darn old that we can’t remember what movies are anymore.

The only story nuggets we know about are that it’s set in the present and, according to Rodriguez, “emotionally charged.” Louis XIII Cognac approached the two film people for this project because they “sought to create a proactive piece of art that explores the dynamic relationship of the past, present and future,” the global executive director of Louis XIII said.

You see, Louis XIII Cognac chooses to ferment their alcohol for 40 to 100 years. The most recent brew is from 1915. Hence this 100 year film.

Who will get to see the film? Louis XIII is sending out metal movie tickets to 1,000 influential people, whose descendants will get to see the film.

To help hype the film, three teasers were made. All showed a different vision of the future. None of the trailers show a frame of the actual movie, however.

With all this mind, I have a few questions.

  1. Is this really going to stay unseen for 100 years? In today’s age of the internet and studio leaks, it’s hard to keep a movie from being seen for 6 months to a year, let alone 100 years. Is the only copy of the film in Louis XIII’s vault? Are we absolutely sure every copy of it has been erased except for that one? Because if not, I don’t see how this will remain unseen for so long.
  2. Are the filmmakers even going to go through with this? This is cynical, but are Rodriquez, Malkovich, and Louis XIII going to stick to their guns? Or are they going to buckle and show the film in like a year, five years, ten years, etc.? Once the little buzz this is getting dies down or people interested get really annoyed, will the people behind this film really be able to resist releasing it? Hell, is this film even for real or is it purely made-up in order to sell some liquor? This could be some big practical joke that we won’t be privy to for a few months.
  3. Even if this film is on the level and even if it somehow manages to stay secret for 100 years and even if we are still watching movies in 100 years, I have to ask what the heck the point is of making teasers for this gosh darn movie. I mean, think about it. We’ll most likely not live to see the film. So hyping it up to us makes no difference. If the intent is to advertise Louis XIII Cognac, that’s stupid, too. I checked. The average price for a bottle of this stuff ranges from $2,100-$3,100 and can sometimes be as high as $34,000. So even if you’re able to get dibs on a bottle of this limited edition alcohol (that, as far as I can tell, has only 786 bottles in existence right now), you probably won’t be able to afford it. So what’s the point of advertising this liquor?

I’ll admit, while pretentious, the idea of putting a film in a time capsule for 100 years is interesting. But I seriously question its practicality. Plus, it’s hard for me to be optimistic about the project when the whole thing is really just an advertisement for some high-end cognac that I have no interest in. But I guess time will tell if this weird idea will actually work or not.

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